Sunday, February 14, 2010

Good Girl Jar

Let me start off with saying how incredible our little girl is... she is so adorable, very sweet, loves everyone, funny, and extremely smart. However, with being in the throws of toddlerhood, we have encountered a power struggle in our house. Both Nick and I, want to be able to give our precious daughter any and everything we can- we are obviously trying to live vicariously through her... don't all parents do that??!! Well, I think it is starting to get to her head! For such a small, sweet girl she can have 1 HUGE attitude, and that just is not gonna fly in this house! Now, just to clarify, this attitude is not always present, we will go weeks with our sweet angel, then BAM- she turns on us for a few days and those few days when she's having her moments can be quite taxing. While in the midst of our "few days of terror", I was chatting with Kari, explaining how I didn't know what to do with this kid sometimes- I discipline and it's like it has zero effect! That's when she came up with the brilliant idea- create a "Good Girl Jar":
The idea is, when Hannah is good: when she cleans up her toys, doesn't have an attitude, get's ready without a fuss, (you get the idea...) she gets to add a cotton ball into the jar. But when she is not acting like she should she has to take out a cotton ball AND go in time out for 3 minutes. When she fills cotton balls to the ribbon, which takes about 35 cotton balls, she gets to pick a special thing to do. During my conversation with Kari, I had a realization- Hannah never has to work for or earn anything in life. I get she is only 3, but when do we draw the line of not just giving her everything?? Her normal life consists of going to frozen yogurt, playing at Bounce-U, riding the carrosel at the mall, getting a new toy basically whenever we go to Target, ect. and we are realizing she is no longer appreciating these wonderful things she gets to do- she merely expects them since they have become normal things in her life. Now, we do feel proud we are able to get our daughter these fun things, however, we do not want to create a spoiled brat. We were both raised to appreciate everything we got and learned what it meant to earn things. Now, I do think there can be a balance of Hannah earning fun things and sometimes not having to earn them and they happen anyway because she's just lucky to have really cool parents :)- but finding that balance is what we are in search of! Parenting is a journey of mostly ups and sometimes difficult downs, but overall when our little Hanny-bug flashes that precious smile or gives us a big 'ol hug and proudly exclaims "I just love you mommy and daddy!!" it feels pretty dang amazing! I'm hoping this Good Girl Jar becomes the answer to our frustrations. So far, cotton balls have become gold in our house, and when she's acting up and has to take 1 out, you would think her world is ending... which makes me excited that maybe she will finally get it and always act like an angel! (Am I asking too much from a 3 year old??!!) So far, the Good Girl Jar has been in our house for 3 days and it is probably half way to the ribbon so maybe soon she will get to earn that bounce session...
Putting cotton balls IN for getting ready and going to bed without stalling or tantrums :) That smile is my favorite of all time!!

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